Happy New Year! I was reminiscing with one of my friends tonight about where we were a decade ago. She turned to her hubby and asked, "Is it weird that she(me) remembers that?"

I piped in and said, "No! We were all psyched about Y2K!" (I just think my friend admires my very good memory) :)

So, this is 2010. I hit a little bunny rabbit on the way home - what a way to begin the year, huh?

I've been thinking alot these past 2 days. I'm kind of ticked at myself. I just spent a week with my family. My biggest fans. The ones who have loved me more then any human beings ever will. The people I love more then anything.

I thought this time would be different. This time I'd be able to shut my mind off and just bask in the love they have for me, and I have for them.

Before this Christmas Season even began, I even realized that my self worth had nothing to do what I have, or even don’t have. So I figured I was good to go!

These two lists, the “have,” and “don’t have,” lists…. Why do I continue to measure myself by these? Especially when I claim to be a changed person? I can still say wholeheartedly that I’ve come to a fuller understanding of the conviction with which my parents raised us kids.

So, why can’t I live like that?

Why do I continually act like I don’t know what I KNOW to be true?

A friend gave me some good advice as to why I act like a knuckle head(those are my words) around family. Apparently, this is an age old struggle for people.

However, that’s not all that comforting. Well, it is, but I’d rather hear that there’s a cure for this.

Well, until next time. I got to get some sleep………….